Programmer Jokes and Funny Facts

Funy Facts

Question Why are programmers using i,j,k,... as variables for for loops?

Answer In Fortran every variable was a real number except the variables i,j,k,l,m,n which are considered integers.

Question Why do programmers start counting from zero?

Answer If you want to access the first byte of a memory you have to use the pointer + 0.

Question Why has all codeeditors by default a limit of 80 character per line?

Answer Punchcard in the past had only space for a 80 characters. So it was a very hard limit historically and has sticked.

Christmas and Halloween

Question Why do programmers always mix up Halloween and Christmas?

Answer

• 31 Dec Christmas
• 25 Okt Halloween

10 Kind of People

Question There are 10 types of people in this world. Those who understand binary and those who don't.

Answer 0b10 = 2

Error Free Programs

Question There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works.

Answer There is no error free program, therefore the anwer is also wrong

Boolean Answer

Question The best thing about a Boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit.

Answer Boolean = 0 or 1 only of by 1bit

Programmer Checks

Question A good programmer is someone who always looks both ways before crossing a one-way street.

Answer Programmers can't make assumptions, they have to check everything

Debugging

Question Debugging: Removing the needles from the haystack.

Answer Debugging is removing bugs form a program. Bugs are hard to find like needles

HTML Tags

Question

Figure 1: Q: How to you annoy a web developer?

Answer HTML Tags are wrong DIV and SPAN means the same. Above code is wrong.

Teacher Punishement

Question

Figure 2: Teacher Punishement

Answer In this joke, his teacher probably gave him the punishment "Write 'I will not throw paper airplanes in class.' on the board 500 times."

#include <stdio.h>
int main(void)
{
  int count;
  for (count = 1; count <= 500; count++)
  printf(“I will not throw paper airplanes in class.”);
  return 0;
}

Accelerate a computer

Question The best method for accelerating a computer is the one that boosts it by \(9.8 \frac{m}{s^2}\).

Answer Let it drop. Earth gravity accelerates it by \(9.8 \frac{m}{s^2}\)

SQL Naming

Question

Figure 3: SQL Name

Answer This joke has to do with SQL, which are commands used to control databases as well as a common hack used against insecure sites, called SQL Injection.

Scripts Automation

Figure 4: Automation 1

Figure 5: Automation 2

Are you feeling ill?

Question

Figure 6: feeling a bit off

Answer One bit is the smallest dataunit. Plays on the double meaning of "a bit" (a bit or one bit (data)).

19 Jan 2038 at 3:14:07 AM

Question What about 19 Jan 2038 at 3:14:07 AM? Remember Y2K? There's another date like it.

Answer In Unix-like systems, time is measured as seconds since January 1, 1970. This time is often stored in a 32-bit signed integer. That means that dates can range between −2147483648 en 2147483647 seconds from 1970. So now you know what it is about 19 Jan 2038 at 3:14:07 AM, it's 2147483647 seconds after January 1, 1970!

To be or not to be